Jill Le Brasseur won last week’s world-famous news haiku competition™ with this beauty about Americans falling behind on our credit card payments:

Congratulations, Jill!

“Yippee!!! I Won!!! Thanks Everybody!!” she wrote in an email, acknowledging the news.

Here’s your celebratory gif:

She had some stiff competition, too:

🟨🟨🟨⬜️⬜️⬜️ Thinner wallet now, Unpaid bills spread like shadows, Paychecks come too slow. ~S Chaney (37)
🟨🟨🟨🟨⬜️⬜️ Sixty days past-due, Rates rise, debt collects, keep up! “but look, you’re approved” ~Autumn Mitchell (50)
🟨🟨⬜️⬜️⬜️⬜️ Buy now pay later, But who can afford to pay? So a bubble grows~ Stephen R. Balzac (29)
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 Bare cart, empty tank, Bills bloom faster than my pay. Hope shrinks with each swipe.~Jill Le Brasseur (69)
🟨🟨🟨⬜️⬜️⬜️ Credit card bill due. Many offer zero fees. Pay it? No interest.~Erika Ettin (35)
🟨🟨🟨🟨⬜️⬜️ Spending is easy. Always paying in full—hard. That’s why credit sucks.~Margaret Lea (49)
269 Votes via @beehiiv polls

This week’s world-famous news haiku competition™ is about how America added more jobs than expected in May, but ironically that send the stock market down because it bolstered expectations for the fed to raise interest rates this year to cool the economy. Good luck getting anything about that into 17 syllables, let alone making it… emotional. Still, I believe in you! Send me your entry—to haiku at cheddar dot com—by noon ET Thursday, for consideration by your Cheddar peers.

Now for God’s sake, man, can we hear about the news?

Matt Davis — Need2Know Chedditor

News You Need2Know

• Markets down as jobs #’s dwarf expectations

• Anthropic urges a global pause in AI development

• 60 minutes boss tries to steady the ship

• Boeing’s nose cone collapses, injuring workers

• Dems urge halt in 24-karat gold coin production

• Poll of the day: After-dinner mint?

What’s the stock market up to, eh?

$SPX ( ▼ 2.64% ) $DJI ( ▼ 1.35% ) $NDX ( ▲ 1.59% )  

Companies mentioned in today’s newsletter

$POLYMARKET ( ▲ 0.77% )  $ANTHROPIC ( ▼ 5.48% )  $OPENAI ( ▲ 0.79% )  $CBS ( 0.0% )  $BA ( ▼ 0.91% )  

Markets down as jobs #’s dwarf expectations

Surprise, America! The economy added a whopping 172,000 jobs in May. That’s more than double what Wall Street’s "experts" actually predicted, keeping the unemployment rate steady at 4.3 percent. Olu Sonola from Fitch Ratings eagerly called it a “blowout jobs report” that proves the labor market is on "firmer footing," talking to the FT. Naturally, you’d think investors would pop some champagne, right?

Wrong. The S&P 500 and Nasdaq immediately plummeted.

Why? Because your newfound employment— congrats, btw!— means the economy is too healthy. Now, the Federal Reserve might actually have to hike interest rates to cool down the inflation worsened by the ongoing war in the Middle East. Polymarket $POLYMARKET ( ▲ 0.77% ) contracts predicting the rate rise rose (try saying that three times, quickly) to 51% on Friday morning after the jobs news.

Stephen Coltman of 21shares captured the Wall Street panic, telling CNBC: “the debate is quickly moving on from ‘when will the Fed be able to cut’ to ‘why isn’t the Fed hiking?!’” Stephen Brown at Capital Economics agreed, telling the FT it is "increasingly likely" the Fed will enact "a couple of insurance hikes later this year."

The White House spun the news positively. “There is clear momentum in the American economy as a result of President Trump’s proven economic agenda of tax cuts, deregulation, and energy abundance that’s unleashing the private sector,” Kush Desai, a White House spokesman, wrote on social media.

Remarkably, opposition leaders felt differently. “President Trump’s failing economic agenda is shrinking families’ paychecks,” Senator Elizabeth Warren, Democrat of Massachusetts, said in a statement Friday. “Instead of fixing the economic pain he’s caused, Trump is doubling down on his reckless tariffs and his war in Iran.”

So, which is it?!

Quote of the Day

Anthropic urges a global pause in AI development

Anthropic $ANTHROPIC ( ▼ 5.48% ) , the $1 trillion artificial intelligence startup, has a groundbreaking idea: everyone should temporarily pause AI development. Why? Because AI is advancing so fast that it might soon achieve "recursive self-improvement" and start upgrading itself without us pesky humans.

Now, you might be thinking, "Wait, isn't Anthropic currently locked in a ferocious competition with OpenAI $OPENAI ( ▲ 0.79% ) for global AI supremacy?" Why, yes, they are! In fact, they are reportedly on track to hit $50 billion in annualized revenue by the end of this month and are actively gearing up for an IPO. But please, don't let their breakneck sprint to tech dominance confuse you—they are very concerned about the societal risks.

Wharton professor Ethan Mollick sums up this corporate identity crisis perfectly. He tells the Wall Street Journal that AI labs are a mix of "normal trillion-dollar company stuff like marketing teams and lawyers," model-building researchers, and "a set of people who are philosopher kings who are concerned about the future… and they’re all in conflict with each other."

So, what are the actual chances of this coordinated global ceasefire happening? Basically zero, and even Anthropic knows it. They admit that verifying a global pause would be thornier than enforcing nuclear-weapons treaties. There is also the inescapable fear of missing out, with the company acknowledging that "whoever continues while others pause could inherit the lead."

Anthropic co-founder Jack Clark perfectly described the exact reality his own company is actively perpetuating: developers are "locked in a competition with one another where commercial and geopolitical rivalries are drowning out the larger existential-to-the-species aspects of the technology being built."

So just carry on as you were, basically.

60 minutes boss tries to steady the ship

Everything is totally fine over at CBS! $CBS ( 0.0% ) The brand new executive producer of 60 Minutes, Nick Bilton, who has never actually run a weekly TV news show before, sent a very reassuring memo to his staff. After unceremoniously firing legendary correspondent Scott Pelley for a "performative display of hostility" (what is it with this modern usage of the word “performative”?), Bilton bravely acknowledged that it has been a "trying and difficult few days.” 

To fix everything, he promoted a new senior producer and told the remaining correspondents that working with them is "every journalist’s dream."

Of course, the freshly ousted Pelley has a slightly different take on the new management's stellar leadership. Pelley publicly accused the executives of literally instructing him to "inject falsehoods and bias" into a politically sensitive story and to push unverified assertions. He also claims they generously let politicians handpick which correspondents get to interview them, which is not an ethical journalistic practice. Pelley even pointed out that the approach almost resulted in an episode missing its airtime by a mere 19 minutes.

Still, Bilton sent a nice letter…

Song of the Day: Taylor Swift, “I Knew It, I Knew You”

Here’s a heartfelt, cinematic, and sweet country-pop miniature that serves as the official theme song for Pixar's Toy Story 5. #AMERICA

Boeing’s nose cone collapses, injuring workers

It was a close call at Frankfurt Airport in Germany last week when the nose gear of a Lufthansa-operated Boeing $BA ( ▼ 0.91% ) 787-9 Dreamliner completely collapsed. The massive aircraft, which can weigh up to 279 tons at takeoff, was parked at a jet bridge when its nose abruptly crashed to the tarmac.

According to the airline, the plane's nose gear "unexpectedly retracted" at 12:45 p.m. local time. This frightening malfunction occurred just over an hour before the jet was scheduled to depart for a nearly 12-hour flight to Los Angeles carrying 165 passengers.

Fortunately, the passengers had not yet boarded the long-haul jet. However, two Lufthansa cabin crew members and an unspecified number of service workers who were already on board sustained minor injuries and were taken to a hospital for treatment. The flight to Los Angeles was canceled, and experts examined the plane before moving it to a hangar for further inspection.

As Lufthansa investigates the official cause of the accident, the aircraft manufacturer addressed the situation. Boeing released a brief statement regarding the collapse, saying, “We’re aware of the incident and are supporting our customer.”

Which sounds a lot like “nothing to see here,” if you ask me.

Dems urge halt in 24-karat gold coin production

Senate Democrats are attempting to hit the brakes on the Trump administration's plans to mint a solid gold commemorative coin featuring the president's own likeness. Senators Elizabeth Warren and Ron Wyden are urging the U.S. Mint to halt the production of the 24-karat gold piece, which is meant to celebrate the nation's 250th anniversary and depicts President Donald Trump leaning on a desk with clenched fists.

The lawmakers are pushing back against the initiative, arguing that the coin "is more befitting a monarchy than a democracy." They are demanding a public audit of the supply chain, citing alarming reports that the U.S. Mint's gold may be sourced from countries where the metal is mined illegally. This includes awkward potential links to exploitation and criminal activity, such as Colombian mines controlled by drug cartels.

Despite the controversy, U.S. Treasurer Brandon Beach defended the design, stating there is "no profile more emblematic" to represent the country's enduring spirit than the serving president. However, the project faces legal hurdles; the bipartisan Citizens Coinage Advisory Committee refused to review the coin, with one member stating that producing it without their approval would be (checks notes) "illegal." Historically, only one other president, Calvin Coolidge, has appeared on a U.S. coin during his lifetime.

Still, that might not stop things. Let us know your feelings on the matter in today’s poll! 👇🏻

Free yourself from advertising forever!

Should you check your 401(k) today?

👎️ 

Nope.

Poll of the day: After-dinner mint?

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