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Greetings N2K reader!

The theme of this week’s world famous News Haiku™ competition is that ChatGPT will allow “erotic” content soon, which might help OpenAI become profitable. I’ve already had some 👨‍🍳😘 entries and there’s still a day to go. Still, email me yours by Thursday at noon ET for a chance to be voted on by your Cheddar peers. THANK YOU.

Now let’s talk about today’s news you Need2Know, shall we?

—Matt Davis, Need2Know Chedditor

News You Need2Know

• How to sound smart about the Amazon crash

• White House adviser hints at end to shutdown

• Breaking down financial barriers with Kikoff

• Sea otters get $2M after Taylor Swift wore their s …

• Americans worried about rising health care costs

What’s the stock market up to, eh?

$SPX ( ▲ 0.38% ) $DJI ( ▲ 0.56% ) $NDX ( ▲ 0.94% )

How to sound smart about the Amazon crash

This is the second part of a two-day-old feature where I take a current news story and do what you really want us to do with it: HELP MAKE YOU SOUND SMART(ISH). Welcome.

So, the Amazon $AMZN ( ▲ 1.03% ) cloud outage ruined your Monday. You couldn’t order food from your favorite app, your office Slack melted into oblivion, and Snapchat’s streaks were in cardiac arrest. But don’t worry. I’m here to make sure you sound like the smartest person in the coffee line.

First, drop the term “US-East-1” into casual conversation like it's an inside secret. That’s the Virginia hub where Amazon stores “orders of magnitude” more data than all its other sites combined, according to Doug Madory, director of internet analysis at Kentik. This one hub basically carries the entire internet on its shoulders like an IT Atlas. When it sneezes, millions of apps catch a cold.

Next, confuse people by noting that the cloud isn’t actually a cloud — it’s really just massive warehouses full of whirring servers. Amazon has over 100 of them in Virginia alone, gearing up like data factories pumping out connectivity.

Finally, sprinkle in existential dread: “Isn’t it wild that 41% of the internet is tied to Amazon?” Everyone will nod solemnly like they always knew this horrifying fact. Don’t forget to say, “The concentration of IT services poses serious fragility for modern society,” but act chill — like you aren’t panicking inside. You win. You’re reasonably smart-ish. You’re welcome.

Song of the day: Silvana Estrada, ’Good Night, Good Luck.’

"Good Luck, Good Night" is a song by Mexican singer Silvana Estrada from her new album “Vendrán Suaves Lluvias,” and reviews describe it as a simmering, dramatic bolero with a sense of slow-burning anger. The track is seen as a melodramatic and humorous kiss-off to "el ghosting" (which, amazingly, means “ghosting”) and a moment of rebellion against disappointment in dating. Critics have noted its dark, late-night atmosphere, which builds a universe of sorrow with warped instruments and its theatrical performance, drawing comparisons to artists like Tom Waits. I think my editor Sydney will like it a lot more than yesterday’s track, which she complained about as akin to Cheetos with no nutritional value over Slack.

White House adviser hints at end to shutdown

The third week of the government shutdown sees no signs of resolution — unless White House economic advisor Kevin Hassett is correct in his optimism. Speaking on CNBC’s “Squawk Box,” Hassett predicted that the shutdown is “likely to end sometime this week” but warned that the Trump administration could impose “stronger measures” to force Democratic cooperation if negotiations stall.

The ongoing impasse stems from disagreements on federal funding priorities. Republicans have advocated for a short-term resolution to maintain current funding levels, while Democrats insist any funding bill must include provisions to extend Affordable Care Act (ACA) tax credits set to expire by year’s end. The GOP-backed bill has failed in the Senate 11 times — with Monday evening’s vote ending in a predictable 50–43 split along party lines.

Hassett suggested that optics may be playing a significant role in the delay, but Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer appears confident in the standoff. “Every day gets better for us,” Schumer recently told Punchbowl News.

Hassett emphasized hope for compromise, stating, “Now there’s a shot that this week, things will come together…moderate Democrats will move forward and get us an open government.” Whether the White House’s proposed “stronger measures” change the game remains to be seen.

Today on the ‘gram: Selling more than the last model

Post of the day: Stuck in the up position

Quote of the Day

Breaking down financial barriers with Kikoff

Millions are struggling to build credit, but good news: fintech companies like Kikoff are stepping up to offer accessible solutions.

"Kikoff is a leading consumer finance app that helps people build credit, cut debt, and save money," co-founder and CEO Cynthia Chen said. Her personal journey as an immigrant to the U.S. at age 17 and her own experience building credit inspired her to launch Kikoff in 2019. She realized "how difficult and expensive life would be without a decent credit score" and wanted to help "millions of underserved Americans."

Chen highlighted the challenges faced by the "credit invisible" — over 40 million Americans whose profiles are non-existent in major credit bureaus. This means "it will be very, very difficult for them to get a rental or get a loan." Kikoff's approach differs from traditional methods because "it doesn't take credit to build credit." They don't do hard inquiries; instead, they focus on identity verification and report on-time monthly payments to credit bureaus. Their plans are also "very, very affordable," starting from "$5 per month."

User feedback has been "really, really encouraging," with the app consistently ranking high in the finance category. Chen noted that users "very often talk about how affordable our plan is and how big of an impact our plan has made on their credit scores." On average, users with positive payment history can expect "28 points of increase very quickly in their credits."

Kikoff's mission extends to promoting economic mobility in underserved communities. Chen shared that they have seen "hundreds of thousands of Kikoff users who were able to get out a loan after becoming a Kikoff customer," and "tens of thousands of Kikoff users started our credit building plan, and then later became a homeowner."

It sounds like Kikoff is truly making a difference in people's financial lives.

Should you check your 401(k) today?

👍️ 

Yes.

Sea otters get $2M after Taylor Swift wore their shirt

When Taylor Swift wears something, the world takes notice — and marine life apparently reaps the benefits. A vintage Monterey Bay Aquarium T-shirt featuring two adorable otters recently sparked an unexpected conservation windfall after Swift wore it to the release party for her overrated new album, “The Life of a Showgirl.” The Northern California aquarium has since raised over $2 million for sea otter conservation in just two days.

The T-shirt, last produced in the 1990s, had Swifties flooding the aquarium’s phone lines in search of the now-iconic design. "We definitely had a little Taylor Swift dance party in the office yesterday afternoon when we hit the goal," said Liz MacDonald, the aquarium’s director of content strategy.

Originally aiming to raise $1.3 million — Swift’s favorite number — the aquarium smashed its goal in less than eight hours, raking in $100,000 every 15 minutes. Donors contributing at least $65.13 (a nod to Swift’s lucky number) received a re-released T-shirt, printed by Liberty Graphics — a Maine-based, eco-friendly company.

The Monterey Bay Aquarium isn’t questioning how Swift got the T-shirt, but theories abound, including a potential otter-related inside joke involving Travis Kelce. "It’s a good problem to have," Matt Enos of Liberty Graphics said, now furiously printing shirts for Swift’s passionate fans.

Cue a host of nonprofit fundraising directors sending Taylor Swift their vintage swag.

Americans worried about rising health care costs

A recent AP-NORC poll highlights a growing concern among Americans about the rising cost of health care, as many prepare for open enrollment and face uncertain federal policies. Nearly six in 10 U.S. adults are “extremely” or “very” worried about health costs increasing in the next year, with concerns transcending age, political affiliation, and insurance status. For many, the fear of not accessing or affording necessary health care weighs heavily.

Latoya Wilson, a 46-year-old nurse consultant from Louisiana, sees these struggles firsthand. “Even before these health care cuts came into play, I was already having a significant issue getting the care that I needed this year,” she told the Associated Press, expressing her anxiety over premium increases and the need for stable, employer-sponsored insurance. “Anything worse than what I already have is pretty scary.”

While eight in 10 adults rank health care as a top personal priority, political divisions remain evident. Caleb Richter, a nursing assistant in Wisconsin, feels government leaders aren’t taking meaningful action, expressing frustration that Congress seems “like a bunch of high school kids arguing.” He added, “It is the federal government’s job to provide a better way of life for its people. Right now, it just feels like they’re not trying.”

The poll reveals that the issue of health care remains significant, but trust in both parties to resolve the crisis is waning.

Poll of the day: How concerned are you about rising health care costs?

Poll of the day: Employment concerns

How confident are you in your ability to find and keep a good job?

🟨⬜️⬜️⬜️⬜️⬜️ Very confident (58)

 🟨🟨🟨⬜️⬜️⬜️ Confident (108)

 🟨🟨🟨⬜️⬜️⬜️ Not confident (113)

 🟨🟨🟨⬜️⬜️⬜️ Not at all confident (142)

🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 Damn I'm glad I'm retired already (at the age of 26 or higher) (230)

⬜️⬜️⬜️⬜️⬜️⬜️ Who needs a job when you have crypto? (4) 655 Votes

via @beehiiv polls

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