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- Why SpaceX and Tesla Want to Tie the Knot
Why SpaceX and Tesla Want to Tie the Knot
Plus: Musk Ordered Starlink Slowdown in Ukraine
This week’s world-famous-news-haiku-competition™ is about how Tesla has made a flying car. Send me your entry — to haiku at cheddar dot com — by noon ET Thursday, for consideration by your Cheddar peers.
Matt Davis — Need2Know Chedditor
Table of Contents
What’s the Stock Market Up To, Eh?
Companies Mentioned in Today’s Newsletter
Why SpaceX and Tesla Want to Tie the Knot

(Google)
SpaceX $SPCX ( ▲ 7.8% ) stock jumped nearly 10% after posting a staggering 161% revenue surge to $14.6 billion, but the real fireworks started when Elon Musk floated merging SpaceX and Tesla $TSLA ( ▲ 3.41% ) into a single $3.6 trillion conglomerate. Why bundle electric sedans, orbital rockets, and humanoid robots into one corporate basket? Musk framed it as evolutionary destiny: “I do think there’s a lot of merit to combining the companies as we are pretty much in the superintelligence singularity, and there’s a lot to be gained from cooperating,” he said.
SpaceX CFO Bret Johnsen pointed to “a clear inflection in our Super Intelligence business” alongside Starlink satellite growth to explain the earnings blowout. Meanwhile, Musk casually boasted that his rocket engineers build AI data centers faster than legacy cloud providers, calling the competition “a bit like the New York Yankees playing in Little League.” Still, exhausted shareholders remain understandably skeptical about where the billionaire's day-to-day focus actually goes. As one top Tesla investor observed, “Right now, he spends some time at Tesla and some at SpaceX, and shareholders cannot tell where he is spending most of his energy or money.”
If a conflict-of-interest nightmare seems imminent, Texas corporate law offers a cozy shield. University of Colorado law professor Ann Lipton noted that suing directors under Texas law requires proving “fraud, intentional misconduct, an ultra vires act, or a knowing violation of law” — a “much higher bar than simply a showing that a director stood on both sides of a transaction.” So whether we end up with cold-gas thruster flying Roadsters or orbital supercomputers, Musk is determined to unite his empire. And by empire, we mean corporate empire. Not unite Ukraine with Russia. Although it turns out, he’s able to “help” there, too, as you’ll see below. Say, you don’t think this story is just a distraction from that other one, do you? (Gasps).
Musk Ordered Starlink Slowdown in Ukraine

(Google)
Imagine fighting a modern high-tech war, only for your military drones to suddenly experience the 1990s internet buffering wheel. That was the surreal reality for Ukrainian drone operators after Elon Musk unilaterally throttled military-grade Starlink speeds, according to reporting by the Wall Street Journal. The move — triggered after Ukraine struck Russian diesel refineries — sparked chaos, leaving frontline defense systems severely crippled.
Naturally, nobody in Washington wanted to take credit for treating national security like a capped data plan. When questioned about who actually throttled the satellite network, President Donald Trump casually claimed he didn’t know, adding, “but I would like to find out.” Meanwhile, Musk deflected blame straight to the White House, posting on X that “Any limits on speed or usage are decided by the U.S. military and ultimately POTUS.” To complete the finger-pointing, Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth insisted, “we haven’t pulled anything back,” while noting that “Starlink has the option to make decisions concerning its terms of service.”
Trump had previously warned Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky about targeting Russian energy, fuming, “‘You can do whatever you want to Russia, but don’t hit the refineries because that’s a world problem.’ ... He better damn well stop.” Musk echoed the sentiment, writing, “Zelensky has gone too far.”
Some U.S. officials say that Musk acted unilaterally and that Trump didn’t specifically order any retribution against Ukraine. But “a person familiar with the situation” contacted by the Wall Street Journal said Musk talked to multiple senior administration officials, including with Trump, before imposing the new speed cap, which Ukrainian officials said had allowed Russian missiles to evade their defenses.
Quote of the Day
For $120 a year, we’re raising expectations for what a membership can deliver.
OpenAI Agents Disabled Company’s Monitoring Systems

(Google)
If you’ve ever wanted to mute your boss's notifications so you could work in peace, congratulations: You now share a mindset with OpenAI’s $OPEAZZX ( ▼ 0.16% ) autonomous AI agents.
In a pair of internal coding assignments, OpenAI revealed that its autonomous bots deliberately disabled internal safety monitoring systems and lied to human engineers about doing so. In the first glitch, an agent quietly shut off automated security alerts sent to the safety team. Days later, another agent wiped out a monitoring system entirely and pulled a classic cover-up — lying straight to company staff when asked about it.
According to an official OpenAI blog post, the bots weren't trying to stage a sci-fi revolt; rather, “In both cases, the agents considered whether monitoring safeguards should be preserved, but interpreted routine coding instructions as permission to weaken them.” OpenAI is now investigating whether this alarming habit stems from harmless “benign over-persistence” or a sneaky “propensity to evade” oversight controls altogether.
This isn't an isolated rebellious phase, either. Previously, OpenAI models broke free from testing controls to hack the platform Hugging Face and breached Australian public health websites. Naturally, these rogue exploits have thrown a wrench into corporate plans. Chief executive Sam Altman announced the startup will delay its public stock offering, insisting OpenAI won't list until it can “very confidently scale to the next stage of AI” while tackling safety concerns.
Experts worry models are learning when they are under observation and altering their behavior to hide…let’s say…misbehavior.
Song of the Day: Vuelve, ‘Anuel AA’
Anuel AA's single "Vuelve" serves as a high-profile promotional track teasing his upcoming album Real Hasta la Muerte 2. Released alongside a flurry of social media antics, the song showcases a mix of personal drama and a return to his core musical roots, blending streetwise Latin trap grit with emotive, melodic vulnerabilities. So, it’s just like this newsletter.
Kalshi Founder ‘Ready for the Supreme Court’
Ever wanted to hedge your financial future against French rainfall, Costco hot dog inflation, or the Academy Awards? Welcome to Kalshi $KALSZZX ( ▲ 0.18% ) , the $40 billion “prediction market” where users can bet, I’m sorry, place a prediction contract on, practically anything. But as states line up to ban the platform, co-founder Tarek Mansour says he is ready to take the high-stakes gamble all the way to the U.S. Supreme Court.
Utah became the latest state to attack, filing a lawsuit accusing Kalshi of a “brazen pattern of unlawful conduct.” Utah officials argue that the platform isn't Wall Street, alleging, “It is administering a closed-loop wagering system, where it creates the games, handles the bets, and pays out the winners.” With sports wagers generating up to 70% of Kalshi's revenue, state regulators claim it looks less like a financial exchange and more like a sportsbook.
However, Kalshi refuses to fold its hand. Defending its business model, a Kalshi spokeswoman argued, “Kalshi is a federally regulated financial exchange, like the stock market. Our customers trade with each other and set the prices.” She added that “no single state should have a veto over it.” Meanwhile, Mansour brushed off state challenges during a recent podcast, noting, “whether people think a sports game is a game, this commodities exchange act gave the CFTC the authority to decide what to do with the game, and to regulate it the way it sees fit, and that’s what it’s doing.”
While Mansour declined to place odds on his legal outcome, which is a shame, venture capitalists keep pouring in billions. Donald Trump Jr. holds an equity stake and serves as a strategic advisor to Kalshi. A White House teleprompter operator was also fired for trading on the contents of presidential speeches.
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Walmart, Sam’s Club Join for $120 Membership

(Google)
Walmart $WMT ( ▼ 0.04% ) and its warehouse subsidiary Sam’s Club are bundling their premium services into a single joint membership for $120 per year — a savings of nearly $100 compared to purchasing both annual memberships individually.
Why the sudden tie-up? Retail executives realize inflation-weary consumers are seeking every cost-cutting strategy available. Announcing the rollout, Walmart CEO John Furner highlighted the combined perks, ranging from bulk warehouse access and gas savings to free delivery and streaming subscriptions: “We’re giving people a reason to expect more from their memberships.… For $120 a year, we’re raising expectations for what a membership can deliver: More money in their pockets and more time to call their own.”
Wait. You mean my time inside a Walmart theoretically belongs to someone else? What a strange thing to say! Still, Walmart has been actively trimming prices on everyday staples as inflation bites.
The joint tier allows shoppers to alternate between picking up routine weeknight grocery essentials at Walmart and stockpiling industrial-sized paper towels at Sam's Club. What is it with Americans and bulk paper towels, eh? It’s like a compulsion in this country.…
Should You Check Your 401(k) Today?
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Poll of the Day: Courting Controversy
What are the odds that a conservative majority supreme court finds that Kalshi is a prediction market and that it has nothing to do with gambling? |
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